Give us a twirl!!

Like Chetan Bhagat's One night at call centre, I had experience of one day at call centre for their hiring process. I will tell you all about this changing scene and spirit of India but for now I share about what I said for interview to prove Britishers would understand spoken English of Gujarati medium educated lady from Rayjcoat!

What do you think a middle aged lady would say for five minutes? 'Saree' ofcourse!

I have found sari as eternal as ancient Indian culture and as new as IT outsourcing to India. Sari reminds me of my childhood, fragrance of my mother wrapped in soft muslin. I started trying out wearing sari at tender age of 4 making sure that pleates dont create lumps and bumps around my waist.

I was fortunate enough to intertwin my love for sari and love for design living in Britain. One of the London museum invited community memebers to take part in sari design competition. the brief described how Indians use design inspirations from their surrounding for example peacocks, mango and elephants combined with local craftsmanship and artistry. Same way NRIs had to use their british surrounding to come up with concept. I chose 3 unique aspect of UK life to create my sketch books.

first, idea I developed was 'tudors'. I created corsett style blouse in ivory raw silk with black lines from piping black silk, like a woonden planks to make it look like wooden black and white tudor house. this was accompanied with flowy chiffon with 3 giant tudor roses for pallu.

Second one, was stamps, postal service is british gift to reast of the world. I tried to symbolize that. Each over lapping stamp to high light high profile faces from british science, politics and sports etc. Blouse to go with like red post boxes of rooyal british times!!

Third design, based on english language itsel with its rich literature. I used words, snaps of poets and writers and blasted words fro famous verses with inetersting juxtaposition..

Today like indian youth has put sari on top inaccessible shelf, british youth have put their language supremacy on top shelf where buddying young minds cant reach. They all are settling for cyber slang and pop language.

coming back to its homein India, I have mixed feelings observing the trends of sari and how its heading towards confined compartment. Lot of new designers use sari as walking canvas for their modern technique of combining fabric, modern embroidery to use threads and paints in contemporary way. No ceremeny is complete without a glamorous sari.

Sari makes a lady look faminine, elegant and sensual. It easily outnumber variety of regional cusine from differnt corners of India and variety of fabric to suit the mood from romance to sorrow and blouses to match, seduction to sainthood.

Sari is versatile tool too. It works as crib for infant sleeping next to poor labouror lady to swing outside huts for toddlers. It is mosquito net at dusk and keeps warm in winter and cool in summer acting as sun screen on hot summer afternoons. it works as sitting mat, rolled as cushion, napkin, blanket, a sack to carry veg from lariwala, basket to collect flowers from morning walks. List elongates with your own imagination.

However, I am saddened to see that sari is being pushes to two extreme end of Indian society. On one hand there are designer sari being used for catwalks that cost fortune, certainly more expensive than buying gold and silver in some cases. On other hand it is stuck with counter job girls, porters, hostesses or labourors. One of the effect of globalization, middle India has entered jeans generation. youth will refuse to wear sari without reason. it is being taken as fancy dress for Indian gathering and while the ceremony is half way girls as young as 9 years start asking if they can change their expensive slawar, lahenga or saree for jeans.

I donr have problem with jeans. Jeans have travelled long way from cowboy america to India today.What I would say to youth today though.. Chillax, girls!! when you wear jeans dont fret about the size and when you wear sari feel comfortable about your identity without fear of appearing orthodox. Flaunt both!! it is called true democracy of dressing up!!

for my PTA in UK and X.Mas parties everytime I walked in fellow british friends envied and said 'Give us a twirl'.

Anxiety

Karna's status anxiety: Anxiety about one's place in the world tends to distort one's character. Karna boasts in order to be observed, to be attended to, to be taken notice of with sympathy, complacency and approbation. The attention of other people matters because human beings are uncertain of their own worth. Our sense of identity is held hostage to the opinion of others. We may not admit it but We all seek to be loved by the world hence the anxiety about how we are percieved. No human being is immune from this weakness. from book 'The difficulty of being good'!!

Indulge

OMG! We are four months into new year, already!! I have not wished anyone!! I want to thank all of you in Manchester for giving me warmth in bone chilling winter in January. Most horribly slow time would have left me dead without you all.

After travelling for 3 engagement, 1 wedding I am back home taking stock of my life once more!!

Boring me. I wrote so much about travelling by richshaws, and servants and buses and all that unglorified stuff.

We now deserve a bit of Spa treatment, don’t we?

I have tried to pamper some of family to spa treatment in Angasana. Mainly Oriental style massages. Hot rock, java, this one and that one, menu is as elaborate as Taj Restaurant. But there are cornerside parlours and give almost same feel good while doing ordinary facial too. My young neighbor just gave a birth to a baby and asked me if I can find a lady to bathe a little one and massage her. Best part about living in India is I don’t have to go looking for services, services come hunting for me. Who should bump into me at my apartment gates? May be I appeared to worn out she thought of me as deserving customer. Whatever the reason I found just the person to recommend to my friend and be good Samaritan for my neighbor!! And having heard story of Lord Rama and Shabri I like to taste what I suggest or serve so why not me first?

She would visit me like a milkman, newspaper man… and daily do something to pamper you. Whole body massage, head massage, fruit facial massage, foot spa, nail spa, weight reducing massage, fairness massage, pregnancy massage, delivery massage, arthritic one and so on there is long list. She recommends different oils for different purpose.

She scanned me and announced I need atleast 6 month daily to declutter body of all that accumulated unwanted fat deposits. And now with all these who needs superficial facials when your blood circulation is improved and you start to glow from inside out.

Thank you Lord and Bless Keyur for spoiling me.

Hunger management - Yogic way

One of the activity I really really missed was our Bhavan Yoga. Jackie is super and introduced me to my own every muscle and chakras in Manchester. Now after a long break I found someone to start baby step again, the yogic way in its heartland.
Its 3 week yoga program in my own club house. Its conducted by a young lad and a lady associate. To do what they are doing one has to go to residential yoga school outside Bangalore. He promised I would lose 4 kg in 3 weeks minimum.

Tough challenge for him!!

First days he coolly announced eat what you like as much as you like.

Next 3 days he kept us on khichadi with 3 spoonful of pure ghee. Every morning he makes us do 1 hour of fast and furious yoga.

The exercises are complimented with Kriya.

First one is Kunjar kriya. (Kunjar Sanskrit for hathi/elephant ) and makes you drink saline at one shot and throw out as elephants with force. Cleansed my oesophagus/food pipe. Wow! Whatey feeling refreshing all the way without eating mint. Suddenly felt gush of cool air touching me all the way in.

Next comes Fruit diet for 2 days followed by shankh prakshalan. Shankh meaning counch. Pour water from throat and comes same clean water from back. This is done by drinking a litre of saline by rounds of aasana and drink and aasanas so on..till your entire body- all folds and nook and crany has been rinsed with warm salted water. Osum! My stomach is as pure as new born baby now. Feel so light and bouncy. Already feel like doing some extra work or art project.

Next comes milk diet… for that, 3 days we cover left nostril and breath only through right. Right breath decides metabolism rate. What it means by breathing only through right you are increasing your metabolism to firey hot state and body learns to use own accumulated fat deposits when hungry. Milk I guess to keep cool. Made me feel very thirsty but no water recommended. However if desperate remove the block from left nostril to take water sips to avoid nosea. Nature has designed such a fascinating body!!

One must eat only when right nose is active and you are hungry . check your own body signal before stuffing my guide guru declares.

And one more week to go… my batch mates have lost from 2 kg to 5 kg weight. I lost 2 but I cheat a bit too. And the way he makes us do yoga has changed the definition of it altogether. Wants be to be young again.

High light is do pranayam:
Drink atleast 3 glasses of water one hour before meals. It triggers your digestive juices. If hungry and if right nose works it. If right stops, stop eating too. After meal sip sip only for 3 to 4 hours and again 4 glasses of water. If you have important meeting, exams, presentations make sure your left nose only is working. As default left only must work until you get hunger. Eating curd closes the hunger valve hence the tradition of giving sugar and curd as shukan as it seals your mouth while on mission.

few breathing exercise before food for hunger check it reduces unwanted binging anyway. Jindal treatment at door step. Lucky me!!

debilitating

When Slumdog Millionaire came, India Knight introduced me to the term ‘poverty porn’. It is for people who get kick out of watching images of misery and poverty of others and at times get tonic for being ‘do gooder’. I certainly don’t belong there. I also understand people who despise emotional crap. East or west ‘emo’ are looked down upon. But I want to put my week’s sight seeing so here I go again…

I almost enjoyed Sanyaasashrum for a while when I was alone but Indian Ocean has power to bring even robots to Life. You cant stand on the shore and watch for long. Before you know it, a tide comes and sweeps you right in deep waters... Before I can consult my inner self about righteousness to be on the side of either Savitri or Gangamma, I am dragged and drenched in the thick of their ordeal. Isn’t that ironic that she should find me from crowded neighborhood, who would know better than me what she is going through with her stomach problems? All be it reluctantly.

…..So Gangamma did not get better, after usual X-Ray, CT scan and all, she needs surgical treatment. Savitri called her own mother to be by the side of patient as she herself wants to keep working and look after 3 kids; one of Gangaama and 2 of her own with running of house. I asked ‘why your mother, why not call G’s parents?’ and I hear ‘G has no family’.

Oh now I am intrigued! Now I have questions about perceived Villian Venky for hurting both ladies! But let it unfold at its own pace, we have urgent health need to be taken care of.

Savitri smarter of the two can speak, 3 broken languages, write phone numbers in English and handles everything around Gangamma. Her son is taking care of G’s girl of under 2 years. She wants only Bhaiya to dress her up before she goes to her English medium ‘Sunshine’ nursery. Knowing the health development, now Savitri’s mother rushes her married son and Savitri’s brother from their village (he is married and after a girl child opted for operation, who says unpadh, gunvaar pay too much emphasis to boy child?) with 10 k ruppees. Madam ko denaa pade toh tum jaldi jao. And Savitri needs him to accompany her at night due to fear of safety(!) and to run tiffins for their mother and G. Savitri has no issues that her kids go to Kannada medium or the casepaper refers Gangama as ‘Mrs. Gangamma’. Life without any issues of any nature. In fact after liberating herself and kids, now G has moved in with her. None of them want vicious Venky near them.

(So Bhai bhi hai and yeh sub bhi karta hai! That would be envy for some)

After first independent visit to Government Hospital Victoria, they repeated four times Madam, hospital thik nahi hai. I thought they are not happy with Hospital so I asked what other options we can think of from limited money? Do you prefer to go else where? No she clarifies. ‘madam, TUMHARE LIYE thik nahi hai, 5 minute bhi aap ko le jana thik nahi.

The building is a cross between majestic british empire building with roman columns, emblems , gold verdigris and a cold stone built jail. I felt as if I would choke with the feel and condition of the building, patients and processes. Once admitted I had hard time changing her unit and surgeon. No computer records to see the progress, no way I can get hold of desired doctor, no food for patient, plenty of mosquitos at night. Big frame of queen Victoria’s lace has been eaten up by fungus and nearly same of the great ramanujan and radhakrishnan.

OH too much to take in. I am burdened with gulit..
I could not generate fund to change her to bigger and better place.
I wish I could make walls of OPD bit more interesting and bearable by spray paint,
I wish I had blanket for mother to spend night on floor.
I wish I did not have to put up with greeting ‘swine flu’ testing as I entered.
In the ward I keep my eyes to my self, in case I get drawn to other Gs.
I try not to breath in case I get flu of some description from unsightly infirms.
Although so much of cheering and jeering from Keyur and his colleagues I could not move her to another unit. When I tried to speak to her original surgeon he asked ‘mere se operation nahi karavaana hai, kya?’
see, surgeons are very possessive about their patients undergoing surgery elsewhere !!!

So defeated on all account like a 'charity school drop out kid' I came back home. I reassured ‘S’ and family that we need to have some faith in God. We did what we could, in fact instead of hating, you are caring so lets shake the guilt out. If that helps me shake my own frustration for not doing enough.

Every time S talks about other ladies she refers as 'woh telugu maam’, ‘woh bangaalee maam’, ‘tamil mam’ so I had to ask her this, ‘mera naam kya rakha hai?’ she covers her eyes with shyness and says with giggle ‘doctor madam’! that’s fastest and easiest way I can get a ‘degree’. And in Rick, rickshawalla tell her, mera madam, mera madam kya bolata hai yeh toh tumara bhagwan hai. (now I know how we got 33 Cr devathas!!). On ward they saw me as Gangamma’s hero. Zero to hero in one journey across Bangalore is not a bad deal.

So treatment continues…life continues…

Touch-me-Not

Wonder what brings out in a person when touched unexpectedly?

Going back to my bus rides again…

Other day I was in childish mood and on crowded bus when I did not show consideration or common sense to slide toward window and would not budge from my seat. When a middle age lady requests I sqeeze myself in a ball so she can go past me and I hold on to my isle seat. No sooner she set in her place, she did nummun to me and ending the gesture with hand on her heart. Why? I don’t have any blessing to offer and I could be younger than you. I never noticed her brushing me. May be she thought she disturbed the aura of Gruhini from Bhadra-samaj by feather touch of her saree! That’s so polite from a so called illiterate but being aware and considerate to space occupied by other than her own body.

But there is touch and there is TOUCH.

Another day I was again on the bus in front seat accompanied by a young girl with some study books in her lap and reading her stuff. Suddenly, she gets up, turns around (entire bus is her auditorium now) and demontrates her ‘public speaking’ skill with leadership skills that makes Bill Clinton looks like a singer. What happened? did I do something? OH ok, Now I understand the boy occupying the seat exactly behind her probably was travelling for the first time in city bus and afraid of falling over, holding on to seat in front so strategically as if on roller coaster ride!!! Not appreciated by young girl, got very public objection. Driver and rest of the bus who could now see the girls face, conductor no one said anything or even noticed for that matter. I was hoping few ladies will turn up to her help if she was distressed by ‘abuse’ and needed few helpline numbers or social workers holding the guy for social disorder act. But No. No need for prolonging.

‘Its your problem you sort out’ And its sorted there and then and very effectively. And the journey continued without anyone ending the ride due to embarrassment.

Sati Saga continued...

Further development in reference to ‘maid-hum’ blog…

Picture abhi baki thaa!!

Finally, after Keyur-Kamya’s complain to me about my dealings with Savitri, I stopped gup-sup with her in the mornings and due to her late start my morning tea was shared with Keyur instead with her so there was total communication break. I also have now a morning walk partner so I leave Savitri alone to mind her business while I am out walking. One fine morning I returned home to find she was asking Keyur for help with her sister’s health.

I was not too keen to get involved and asked her to visit nearby hospital at first instance but she insisted she will only go with me and only to ‘saaraa’ hospital.

Maidum, saree raat dukhataa hai, kauno dekhata nahi hai. Vankatesh toh mar jayegi toh bhi parvaa nahi.

In the morning I find her with silent tears waiting for me and I reassured ‘chintaa mut karo. Sub thik ho jayega.’

To that Savitri clarified on her behalf that she is crying for her little girl of under 2 years. She gave mamma cuddle and cried helplessly ‘mamma tum thik nahi ho. Mere hug dene se jyadaa dukh ho to main door baithu?’ Dudh pita bachha bhi dekhata hai. Savitri and Gangamma (as we call her) were touched with poor child’s love and thoughtfulness.

Oh, so that’s why she is in tears not because she is in pain.

After postponing for a day or two finally we went to Wockhardt to see Keyur’s colleague.

So symbol of purity and purifying Gangamma who is actually ‘other woman’, and what do I say about compassionate Savitri? There is something more in life than ego, status quo, pains, gains, religion, philosophy that is humanity. She also knows that trouble is with immature men and not women.
Getting off from Rick, Savitri asked ‘maidum thik toh ho jayega na?’

bollywood bites: Ritik looks irresistible in reliance pied pier advert and lifts the brand for sure. Who says Kajol cant do movies? All the advert she has done is one movie legnth long!! But she appears to be passing time or grabing bread and butter jobs from her assignments.