debilitating

When Slumdog Millionaire came, India Knight introduced me to the term ‘poverty porn’. It is for people who get kick out of watching images of misery and poverty of others and at times get tonic for being ‘do gooder’. I certainly don’t belong there. I also understand people who despise emotional crap. East or west ‘emo’ are looked down upon. But I want to put my week’s sight seeing so here I go again…

I almost enjoyed Sanyaasashrum for a while when I was alone but Indian Ocean has power to bring even robots to Life. You cant stand on the shore and watch for long. Before you know it, a tide comes and sweeps you right in deep waters... Before I can consult my inner self about righteousness to be on the side of either Savitri or Gangamma, I am dragged and drenched in the thick of their ordeal. Isn’t that ironic that she should find me from crowded neighborhood, who would know better than me what she is going through with her stomach problems? All be it reluctantly.

…..So Gangamma did not get better, after usual X-Ray, CT scan and all, she needs surgical treatment. Savitri called her own mother to be by the side of patient as she herself wants to keep working and look after 3 kids; one of Gangaama and 2 of her own with running of house. I asked ‘why your mother, why not call G’s parents?’ and I hear ‘G has no family’.

Oh now I am intrigued! Now I have questions about perceived Villian Venky for hurting both ladies! But let it unfold at its own pace, we have urgent health need to be taken care of.

Savitri smarter of the two can speak, 3 broken languages, write phone numbers in English and handles everything around Gangamma. Her son is taking care of G’s girl of under 2 years. She wants only Bhaiya to dress her up before she goes to her English medium ‘Sunshine’ nursery. Knowing the health development, now Savitri’s mother rushes her married son and Savitri’s brother from their village (he is married and after a girl child opted for operation, who says unpadh, gunvaar pay too much emphasis to boy child?) with 10 k ruppees. Madam ko denaa pade toh tum jaldi jao. And Savitri needs him to accompany her at night due to fear of safety(!) and to run tiffins for their mother and G. Savitri has no issues that her kids go to Kannada medium or the casepaper refers Gangama as ‘Mrs. Gangamma’. Life without any issues of any nature. In fact after liberating herself and kids, now G has moved in with her. None of them want vicious Venky near them.

(So Bhai bhi hai and yeh sub bhi karta hai! That would be envy for some)

After first independent visit to Government Hospital Victoria, they repeated four times Madam, hospital thik nahi hai. I thought they are not happy with Hospital so I asked what other options we can think of from limited money? Do you prefer to go else where? No she clarifies. ‘madam, TUMHARE LIYE thik nahi hai, 5 minute bhi aap ko le jana thik nahi.

The building is a cross between majestic british empire building with roman columns, emblems , gold verdigris and a cold stone built jail. I felt as if I would choke with the feel and condition of the building, patients and processes. Once admitted I had hard time changing her unit and surgeon. No computer records to see the progress, no way I can get hold of desired doctor, no food for patient, plenty of mosquitos at night. Big frame of queen Victoria’s lace has been eaten up by fungus and nearly same of the great ramanujan and radhakrishnan.

OH too much to take in. I am burdened with gulit..
I could not generate fund to change her to bigger and better place.
I wish I could make walls of OPD bit more interesting and bearable by spray paint,
I wish I had blanket for mother to spend night on floor.
I wish I did not have to put up with greeting ‘swine flu’ testing as I entered.
In the ward I keep my eyes to my self, in case I get drawn to other Gs.
I try not to breath in case I get flu of some description from unsightly infirms.
Although so much of cheering and jeering from Keyur and his colleagues I could not move her to another unit. When I tried to speak to her original surgeon he asked ‘mere se operation nahi karavaana hai, kya?’
see, surgeons are very possessive about their patients undergoing surgery elsewhere !!!

So defeated on all account like a 'charity school drop out kid' I came back home. I reassured ‘S’ and family that we need to have some faith in God. We did what we could, in fact instead of hating, you are caring so lets shake the guilt out. If that helps me shake my own frustration for not doing enough.

Every time S talks about other ladies she refers as 'woh telugu maam’, ‘woh bangaalee maam’, ‘tamil mam’ so I had to ask her this, ‘mera naam kya rakha hai?’ she covers her eyes with shyness and says with giggle ‘doctor madam’! that’s fastest and easiest way I can get a ‘degree’. And in Rick, rickshawalla tell her, mera madam, mera madam kya bolata hai yeh toh tumara bhagwan hai. (now I know how we got 33 Cr devathas!!). On ward they saw me as Gangamma’s hero. Zero to hero in one journey across Bangalore is not a bad deal.

So treatment continues…life continues…

Touch-me-Not

Wonder what brings out in a person when touched unexpectedly?

Going back to my bus rides again…

Other day I was in childish mood and on crowded bus when I did not show consideration or common sense to slide toward window and would not budge from my seat. When a middle age lady requests I sqeeze myself in a ball so she can go past me and I hold on to my isle seat. No sooner she set in her place, she did nummun to me and ending the gesture with hand on her heart. Why? I don’t have any blessing to offer and I could be younger than you. I never noticed her brushing me. May be she thought she disturbed the aura of Gruhini from Bhadra-samaj by feather touch of her saree! That’s so polite from a so called illiterate but being aware and considerate to space occupied by other than her own body.

But there is touch and there is TOUCH.

Another day I was again on the bus in front seat accompanied by a young girl with some study books in her lap and reading her stuff. Suddenly, she gets up, turns around (entire bus is her auditorium now) and demontrates her ‘public speaking’ skill with leadership skills that makes Bill Clinton looks like a singer. What happened? did I do something? OH ok, Now I understand the boy occupying the seat exactly behind her probably was travelling for the first time in city bus and afraid of falling over, holding on to seat in front so strategically as if on roller coaster ride!!! Not appreciated by young girl, got very public objection. Driver and rest of the bus who could now see the girls face, conductor no one said anything or even noticed for that matter. I was hoping few ladies will turn up to her help if she was distressed by ‘abuse’ and needed few helpline numbers or social workers holding the guy for social disorder act. But No. No need for prolonging.

‘Its your problem you sort out’ And its sorted there and then and very effectively. And the journey continued without anyone ending the ride due to embarrassment.

Sati Saga continued...

Further development in reference to ‘maid-hum’ blog…

Picture abhi baki thaa!!

Finally, after Keyur-Kamya’s complain to me about my dealings with Savitri, I stopped gup-sup with her in the mornings and due to her late start my morning tea was shared with Keyur instead with her so there was total communication break. I also have now a morning walk partner so I leave Savitri alone to mind her business while I am out walking. One fine morning I returned home to find she was asking Keyur for help with her sister’s health.

I was not too keen to get involved and asked her to visit nearby hospital at first instance but she insisted she will only go with me and only to ‘saaraa’ hospital.

Maidum, saree raat dukhataa hai, kauno dekhata nahi hai. Vankatesh toh mar jayegi toh bhi parvaa nahi.

In the morning I find her with silent tears waiting for me and I reassured ‘chintaa mut karo. Sub thik ho jayega.’

To that Savitri clarified on her behalf that she is crying for her little girl of under 2 years. She gave mamma cuddle and cried helplessly ‘mamma tum thik nahi ho. Mere hug dene se jyadaa dukh ho to main door baithu?’ Dudh pita bachha bhi dekhata hai. Savitri and Gangamma (as we call her) were touched with poor child’s love and thoughtfulness.

Oh, so that’s why she is in tears not because she is in pain.

After postponing for a day or two finally we went to Wockhardt to see Keyur’s colleague.

So symbol of purity and purifying Gangamma who is actually ‘other woman’, and what do I say about compassionate Savitri? There is something more in life than ego, status quo, pains, gains, religion, philosophy that is humanity. She also knows that trouble is with immature men and not women.
Getting off from Rick, Savitri asked ‘maidum thik toh ho jayega na?’

bollywood bites: Ritik looks irresistible in reliance pied pier advert and lifts the brand for sure. Who says Kajol cant do movies? All the advert she has done is one movie legnth long!! But she appears to be passing time or grabing bread and butter jobs from her assignments.

Being hospitable

Dear friends, Its not that I don’t remember you all but it seemed life has been uneventful. It’s easier to end up writing when you internalize your feelings. Now that Keyur is here I end up talking about everything that I see, hear and feel. Also I feel less like a tourist and more at home so wondering has reduced. Also, at times I feel resigned as to why this endless explanation, who would want to know from a person without a purpose.

Anyway, after coming, pillar of my strength and smile of my soul, my mother dug our flat in ahmedabad to make it more comfortable for her ‘foreign returned kids’!! Two months sitting in the middle of heap of cement and sand took its toll on everyone but she is the one who never complained once and not only that, made every recipe with lot of care to suit our taste buds cooking on floor in single room living space. Still, every morning I wake up with aroma of sukhdi, upama, peanut halwa and what have you. And I ask why? There is no need when there are no resources and she goes 'in case so and so ends up coming' and that 'so and so likes that item' so she is ready with token of her affection for that individual that she would be carrying all the time. She is eternally overflowing with love and whoever comes across receives it and moves on. To me she is true ‘hospitality industry’ in herself. Nothing in the world can beat that. But today I want to write about real Indian hospitality Industry.

So now I had reason to find out about party scene in India. I enquired to various known names, Taj vivanta, palm meadows, oazone, unwind island etc etc to gather and with help of local new and some long time friends and relatives I approached and finalised with one hotel, savannah. It is first time I kept my head sleepy through out planning. Bit like mental paralysis. It just happened without much effort from me. Only thing I had to do was think aloud and I got help from friends, friends-friends and drivers of friends-friends!! Last Diwali I made assorted 3 variety of fruit jams. This year nothing! Thought this party is good reason to think of something as take away return gift. As soon as I expressed my desire I got idea from a well wishers on ways I could do it. Nobody said once ‘r u sure u want to do this?’, ‘there is no need to do this’. People don’t question or challenge your social commitment. Next comes budget… again nobody judges or gets impressed by what you can do. ‘Yatha-shakti’ is appreciated and implemented with respect however little. Even if I had settled to distribute elphants as return gift, without goose bumps they would have suggested the best way to acquire them and how to manage before party and how to arrange distribution. There were suggestions to give freshly made chocolates and there was suggestion for stuffing goody bags with chashew preparation with chocolate. I chose the nutty option.

And the real stuff is the dinner. It is reassuring to have chef, event manager and a friend all sit together and discuss various dishes. I was silent observer of new trends. First lesson is that any variety of Koftas are out of favourites-list. It has been replaced by lot of dishes of lightly prepared vegetables in range that streches from mexico to guantanamo bay. When chef came to know that party is being planned in his hotel and not catered else where, was delighted and volunteered that he can be as creative as he can be. I needed to know how? He described how he can almost create a kitchen theatre by some dessert menus. We chose Flambe fruits they prepare fruits as they do Christmas pudding on fire and sets the atmosphere. The pancake station and the list is end less.

Maam we will keep six variety of mocktails. Sounds good to me I am already sold. (I only know what it took for me to make even one fruit punch starting from carrying bagful of fruits from Tesco) Six mocktails prepared and served by others is unthinkable luxury for me. Let my friend negotiate on prices and number of cocktails. My thirst was already quenched and I remained satisfied detached observer.

Now I had to choose 3 salad from 20. Not too bad, I can visualize some and I can taste some. Some I could try from their buffet counter before I decide at lunch time. Thanks to a friend this buffet was offered to figure out what we would really like.

Now the overwhelming part. Choose four vegetables from over 100. Divided mainly in 4 categories. One from Paneer and cheese. Other three from International cuisine, oriental and Indian. Same categories applied to again seasonal vegetable preparations. Not my cuppaT!! I allowed my doctor lady companion to make the decision. She knew the new trends and tried global recipes. (doctor and not talking about oncalls and medicine but passionate about creative cooking and world cuisine!! That’s very refreshing change to my ears ) What I also feel is when you eat Indian food outside India its way below the standard Indians can prepare, even if it is prepared by Indian residing abroad. Where as Indians here can take any world cuisine and make it so appeatizing!! Mexican obergine subji!! The list is mind blowing, mouth watering.

They prepared the welcome board for guests and the staff circulated to ask for drinks and starters. I did not have to go in overdrive to check and say ‘have this, try this’.

Hotel manager not just sorted the food and the décor he also suggested about organzing DJ and MC. DJ I have heard before but what is MC? I gave blank look feeling bit like a tarzen just entering the civilization. MC, you know! master of ceremony. He gave range of options again. This guys and gals are endlessly enegetic, work in offices in day and evening they plan events and some days perform. They are in all shapes and sizes and value attached. Some command lot of money bcos doing small time parties is not their style. They work with corporate giants only. Their charges start from 10k to 2.5 lakh. Just like my chef he recited many themes to choose from caricature artist, tattoo, table magicians and the list is long. Again its how they package and sell those predictable art to suit the party is interesting. I called DJ and he was off to Goa for some carnival but arranged everything and remained on phone with his associates here through out party if they were following the time and requirements. He suggested number of DJs and understood our need and respected our fobias about kind of DJ/MC we can have due to sizeable young crowd with girls as well as guys.

He did not raise eyebrows when he realized that basically we were looking for someone like ramdevbaba with little bit of knowldge of hiphop. He promptly reassured me he had just the person in mind, only it will cost more. Never once he made us feel we were weird and he tried till last minute to find suitable person. Not only that his services extended way beyond his call of duty as DJ. For me he was event manager and also when anxious kid expressed objection to planning he said 'maam, let me do the talking'. He got her to think our way in the end so he acted as proffessional councillor. On way back from Goa he picked up CD of photos for me before coming to collect his dues. He was eager to see all the photos and get introduced to who's'who. (Business expansion w/o MBA) and when going through photos I expressed horror to my size, he had solution ready in pocket. 'Maam dont worry, give me you PC and he tweeked few pixels to eliminate undesirables'

He even arranged phographer. I don’t know what photographer looked like as he was there but almost invisible. Most pictures he took were natural rather specially given poses, Aaah that’s better somebody thinks like me. When I got engaged nobody understood beauty of real life photos instead people preferred to give forced smiles.

So that’s the end of partying to mark my kitten entering kidult to adulthood. She says she had the best birthday ever. she says Indians are the most sociable without hang ups and join in effortlessly when you come up with idea. That was my experiment with heady mix of having young crowd along with elder community relatives and professional friends and neighbours. I was nervous and restless if it backfire. From choice of music, food, cloths everything has to be considered keeping in mind broader section of society present on the same floor but I think it went just fine. For some watching these youth dancing away was a show or theatre as they would never go to disco techs. We ended the event by waving good bye to party place situated on terrace by the pool.

We had cracking diwali too. Keyur got 2 firework items only. Both 10,000 loom of tadaafudee. One in ahmedabad and one in Bangalore. I thought my blog was becoming dominated by festival after festival so took a break!! Fond memories of days spent with you all. More later……...

Going Public

OK, it was only half truth what I said about doing it in privacy. We are neither reserved nor private people. There are lots of things we find unthinkable doing it in public happens very publicly here.

First, credit card. Lot of businesses keep credit card swiper in hard to access areas and ask very frankly ‘chip and pin’ code to complete the transaction. We have to shout out loud our PIN and they enter. Public handling of your personal details is Suhuj – accepted gesture.

Talking on mobile is one such act. Houses are solid with very earthy feel and lot of times people go in ‘chouk’ or town square or balcony and speak from top of their voice to communicate most sensitive of issues.

Let me leave something for imagination too....

Food Junkie

Travelling on European trains taught me how to eat!!! For example, having milk and sugar free coffee with snicker bar or cake of some description. So strange harboring on 2 extremes! Either deprive completely or consume till it piles on you. What stops them from adding few particles of sugar to quench craving for sweetness or quick energy and avoid calorie bombs? I could notice such habit because of public display of consuming food on transport and roads.

Indians are great gastronomic enthusiast and we cant deny that there are plenty of people living on street and cooking under the trees. We also find shack and gullas every few metres. But what I have failed to find is people walking with their food in their hands in public places. I have travelled by 3 different category of buses from cheapest to AC coaches but I have not seen even a poor child moving their jaws munching. Certainly no chewing gums. Other day when congress shifted shashi tharoor to ‘cattle class’ transport I felt like objecting the word ‘cattle’ used for average public who take shower and comb their air and add jasmine to their long locks. Their demeanor makes you wonder if it is justified to call them cattle class? They are more civilized than many other global citizens. In india generally consuming food is considered private affairs as private as combing hair (especially if they are long), counting money. There is component of sacredness and respect attached to privacy. Also it is uncivil to consume food and not share with people who are watching. There could be element of ‘nazar lage’ if you consume something that others are not capable of having without sharing with them. Whats amazing is most are carrying tiffins to work but I have so far not seen one person discreetly trying to eat an apple or hot chips on utterly long and boring journey through the city roads. Which also means they eat at right time to their satisfaction before taking to road as second nature. Also roadside gullas have cluster of people consuming in those designated areas without walking away with it.

I must admit though snicker bar with milky sugar free coffee tastes really good! And in Banglur I find hot chips so irresistible it is difficult to wait till you reach home! Becoming civilized is slow process!

Skip, Jump n Spin

I had unexpected chance to visit Ahmedabad again. Visiting home town always brings cool content after refreshing social links of generations given in inheritance but there are few special days when it brings extra cheer. Yes, although I could not play garba much we visited the Vibrant Gujarat celebration for Navaratri (festival of dance for non stop for 2 weeks).

A massive ground was coverd in smooth hessian not allowing a spec of dust to fly and comforting to the feet. Beautifully decorated gates allowed entire city to walk in without stampede. Inside the ground every year there is exhibition based on one concept displaying interesting details of achievements, heritage, projects, places of Gujarat. Some areas had temporary landscape gardens. They even had Maduradam (Holland) style miniature Gujarat with its hills and ropeways etc. There were makeshift temples, replica of ancient carvings of 7 forms of mothers from Vadnagar. All emergency services. Facilitating public services such as fire, police and ambulance. Number of stalls for local handicrafts from genuinely rural Craftsmen needless to add number of mouth watering food joints. Everything is so well organized and chaos and mess free, it is simply enjoyable.

Then comes the main part, the garba. I find the words most fascinating! Who is preparing to worship Goddess and how? And the lyrics describes everyone from Mochi, Kumbhar, Soni, Suthar (shoemaker to Carpenter) and how they use their skills to offer tribute to Ambaji in terms of creative and playful worshipping. Surely, in ancient times these labels were not social statements for high or low place in society but mere introduction of ones profession when yellow pages were non existent. It suggets in ancient times castism or classism was not used to discriminate or appeasement. Next comes special needs people, yes garba goes to celebrate how a deaf and dumb and crippled and handicapped joined in celebrating the festivity and faith. Oh, does that mean equal opportunity was weaved in social inclusiveness ? Then comes the shringar rus… look at how they describe Goddess herself dressing up to hilt to dance and in addition she comes down from her seat and villagers to join in the party times. Wow that’s is very in-vogue Goddess we have!! Thats just 3 garba sampling and there are tons of lyrics to suggest and celebrate many such aspects human existence.

I remember some years back there was monopoly of expensive ticketed club style dandia. Now this state sponsored free picnic for citizens have changed the scene. Young and old, highly skilled and young along with arthritic geriatric civilian all enjoy. As Keyur says ‘where would you find entire population, most modern jeans generation, globally attuned youth yet dressed in most traditional folk costumes and still flaunting themselves?’ Good thing is, to dance in main circle wearing traditional outfits are complusory, however there is plenty of room outside this open yet fenced circle and people walking in casually are welcomed to do garba in their little groups all over the place. To recollect the vibrancy and flare of each costume is going to take another mail shot!! Even the boys are dressed in colours and they spin better than girls. How restrictive for the boys in western world to remain imprisoned in blue and grey without even a day of vaction to colourful ‘me’. I think this colour therapy helps them detox and destress along with physical MOT to check stamina and energy.

The new metro passes through this venue 10 km on both sides. Metro is free and roads and tracks are ready in impressive way. When you see all dressed up families and groups and couples and vehicles of all sorts passing and walking through, you forget whether it is 11 am or pm. There is lot to write about inauguration and closing events as well. All the folk artist of other corners of india are invited to perform sharing the stage at same time about 800 of them as state guest artists. At the time of Aarti Raja and Praja join in together. CM of the state, top industrialists, artists and 10-15,000 civilians all sing together in pleasant dark holding diya in their hands. Hard to find such open air show anywhere else!

Jay jay Somanath, jai ho Gujarat!

At Ahmedabad airport the billboard displays the temp 42’ and pilot announces landing at Bangalore 24’, reverse! May be the heat released by youth using their energy in to the air!

Coming back to Bang is truly exotic experience. Again the whole place covered in banana stem/leaves. Entering my carpark makes me wonder if there in mass collection of honeymooners as each car is decorated with flowers and garlands. Some have 2 banana stem sticking like wipers and some well travelled vehicles had 2 leafy broom sweeping the roads of banglur. Its Dussera, remember?! Drivers spent hours doing puja of their vehicles as if it were a human. I will feel lucky if my heart warms up enough to do such gesture to at least a human. I have been told that to watch stately parade of gold studded elephants of mysore king the top ticket costs 5000 ruppees! Lets see if I get chance next year!

Let me stop before I impair your vision by attacking you with colours!

Immersing Art

Otherday, I was watching this roadside artists doing last minute touch up for Durga Puja. I felt these artists deserve more recognition. They do beautiful job and devote themselves to their artistry. They even look as scruffy as posh and celebrated artists! They just completed their deadline for Ganesh Chaturthi. These communities spend their entire time making amazing statues in all different size and shape and postures. But what is even bigger than their art is their willingness to allow their art, their hard work of good six months to be dissolved in water. I wonder what would I do if I was part of their team? I am sure I would cover my creation in water proof mould and request my client to do puja and after symbolic submerge return my sculpture back to me for safe keeping on my top shelf as I loved That unique posture I created! Also is it not so amusing that each piece is unique as compare to standardized plastic moulded Santa we get in Tesco allowing many mouths to earn honorable living and keeping the art form organic and alive?

On the subject of allowing Ganeshji and Durgaji to take a plunge in the water, Indians are increasingly aware of creating environmentally/universally friendly Gods. In our society there is internet group for all occupants and they remind everyone on all these issues too along with other notices!

I am glad this ritual allows yet again another cycle of creating these statues, bringing a year long living for their families again. So in that respect maybe they are not selfless workers and also good businessmen to have settled for consumable items after all!!

Copyrighting

Haven’t we heard that copying is the ultimate form of flattery? I would call it admiration for someone or something when I copy someone, if I do. Then why are we so obsessing about being copied?

I have seen every other business with the name Venkatesh or Manjunath. There is sizeable followers of Saibaba and most have names Jai Sai Nath. No one person has patented for admiring one God or Role model, simple.

Let me drive past Saibaba Ashram and I have lux villa gated estate called ’10 downing’(I deliberately wont call it ‘colony’). And I wonder why on earth this name? What do they convey? Power? Prestige? Colonial times, English settlement getting off the boat in the IT hub, reminding sweet times during London Holidays? At least they should have verified that 10 downing is not grand and has less bathrooms to add inconvenience to British Prime minister with new born baby. PM struggled to change the curtains and interior and finally moving to 11 downing. I have also seen laariwala by the name Buckingham palace serving roadside food.

As it happens Ahmedabad has great place to buy healthfood Khakhra. Lady who started it called her business ‘Induben khakrawala’. Either God gifted most Indu with Khakhra making art or most khakhra makers happen to have the name Indu. There are now more than one Indu Khakhra outlets. The original Induben has stared printing her own face like ‘most wanted INDU’ on her packaging. Don’t go by the name Indu, check out my pretty face before you buy it. If you have name Indu and want to start khakhra business by your own name why should you require check for copyrighting?

You cant deny other people of using their own names or their Gods to start business. Most Indians will not try to prevent others from doing something, instead they find answer to beat competition by introducing other innovative ways.

de-fine-dinning

I felt really demotivated after that bhakhree incident that I badly needed some booster to put me back in cooking mood! So they had to treat me somewhere!! let me take you to one of the newly opened restaurant. It would be more appropriate to call it food chemistry lab! Its an art, artistry, culinary and science and new techniques rolled in one.

At risk of sounding more like a teacher than a friend I write this…

Its called Caperberry. serves traditional Spanish, French, Italian, Greek ingredients but cooked with most modern technique. Concept of the menu was also different – they prepared Single main ingredient with 3 different techniques for one dish.

First, came complimentary Melon foam shot, super light, frothy and full of fragrance. Made with nitrogen. Lot of their recipes used nitrogen for cooking. This was served with 2 tiny cubes of feta cheese and apple jelly/jelo/tutifruti in a soup spoon.

One of the main dish had 3 preparations of aubergine. Aubergine cappuccino (frothy hot soup), abergine cannelloni (fine sliced and rolled with fetacheese stuffed inside), and baked/roasted slab of cheese stuffed obergine.

One of the dessert dish was made from apple. Spongy cupcake style bite size portion and garnished with apple wafer slice, apple sorbet with concentrated flavor and third with toffee style jelly wedges. All fresh.

Mushroom soup had five exotic variety of fresh mushrooms.

Oh, so you are saying you get all these in Inndeeaaaa???? Aur nahi toh kya?

(Caperberry, considered an aphrodisiac in Hebrew claimed to awaken senses. Its dark green berry with pink flesh and white flowers grow on climbing shrub). When asked chef if I could go inside kitchen and see his tools of cooking in vaccuum, with nitrogen and at ultra low temp and surface cooking, he said no big deal he could prepare the portion on my table if like!!

Now let me try something similar at home next time. My ingredient is good old golden besan. First technique steaming and make tiny portion of dhokla garnished with chilli garlic paste, second technique is boiling, miniscule portion of khaandavi roll drizzed with green chutney and finally the third frying in form of fafda , stack of 3 small squares garnished with diced green chillies.

See, Gujarati fine cuisine looks just as good and is also healthy especially when served on most essential ingredient for fine dinning, a big square white plate to arrange all three bite size portions diagonally.

Enjoy your weekend. Ta.

--------- time pass from menu till food arrives ---------

Deconstruction – Modern reinterpretation of a classic dish using same ingredients but different cooking techniques.


Cryo Cooking – An innovative method of cooking using Liquid Nitrogen. At minus 196°C liquid nitrogen cools the surface of food very quickly creating an interesting texture. At Caperberry we use it for preparing chilled mousses called ‘cryo espuma’ that are frozen on the surface and soft within. They act as palate cleansers and refresh your taste buds.


Sous Vide – Sous vide can be defined as slow cooking under vacuum at a precise temperature. Harold McGee describes it as ‘one of the most important culinary innovations of modern times’. It involves two steps and equipment. The food is packed in a vacuum bag with the help of a vacuum packing machine and then immersed in a water bath heated to the optimal cooking temperature. This prevents the leaching out of juices, retains the tenderness and flavour while cooking the food to perfection.


Espuma – Mousse or sauce incorporated with air using a nitrogen canister or bamix. This makes it light and frothy and helps bring out the flavour.


Caviar – A technique of containing a liquid by itself without any external casing in the form of mini encapsulations resembling caviar. When made to the size of a soup spoon it is also referred to as spherification or skinless ravioli.

Driving Force

Finally, more than a year after getting off the driving seat, I want to go behind the wheels again. After few trips to driving school to prove my ID and address I was invited to go for the test to get ‘L’.

As I enter the school, I see a frame with 3 Gods from 3 religions on the wall mounted in one frame. This frame is very popular in many places especially buses. I don’t think it is political statement, its just that they want passengers to feel safe sufferers on precarious roads. No matter who you believe in we can supply raksha kavach to you all.

I was given few road signs to memorize. Most were similar to any other place except for few with animals: No bullock cart, No tonga wala, No push cart etc . And what I thought was commonsense hand signals are now formally taught here. ‘This is for over taking.’ He goes. Meaning what I ask ‘I am over talking’ or ‘you can overtake me’? Later one. Ok then I will use it all the time, and Keyur will never need that one.

Now theory out of the way, his instructor takes 4 of us to RTO.

Rule number one. Don’t think too much. C’mon move.

Now we have been trained by methodical English driving school that we need to check rearview mirror every few seconds and same for wing mirrors. But here front mirror has been adjusted so that instructor can see from his passenger seat, while learner manages to drive without checking what he leaves behind. Typical mentality! We need to focus only on the road ahead and find space to creep inside the space available in front. To keep an eye on other road users is not our business and is total waste of time! To prove a point, look, rickshaw can never reverse, if he over shoots he has to make U turn to reverse 2 metres back or get off and pull the rickshaw back. Thank God they have not modified car engine to suit ‘ahead only’ mentality. Three point turn, reverse parking and all those minor skills will be learnt later on in real life situation. Regarding rearview mirror, I don’t think he means to be nosey but person who spends every waking minute in car need some live entertainment and mirror allows him to see what people are up to in the rear seat.

Rule number 2. Be aware of strength of your vehicle. As we drive forward, instructor asked to stop the car, called cyclist and hackled him for god knows why. If you have not worked hard enough in life to be able to ride bigger vehicle then it serves you right to be taunted! This land of Gods with so many variety of vehicle in ancient time lived in total harmony. Ambaji from her tiger and bruhaspathi on his elephant respected Ganesh ji on his mouse. Whatever happened to that?

At office, I went in chamber to see officer. He has no moochh and long dhadhi but has ganesh and lukshmi with fresh garland on the wall. (Everyone likes hassle free life with lot of money. Also, I feel that brainy professionals have luxury to hold strong political and religious views as they are confident of their skills and secure in jobs where as people in business see every human interaction as potential profitable business and are more tolerant) ok let me not stray and get back on road to driving….

He decided I don’t need test after all. And grants me L.

Cockpit ritual

After long time I went back to my office. My manager asked another colleague to mentor me. Now what does he do? He ignores I am around first he goes to three different cubicles where images of lord shiva, ganesh and saibaba are kept on the desk of his colleagues and does nummun! That’s obvious, I can imagine that much. Then he dials couple of numbers while informing me that first call of the day he makes to either his mum or wife. That’s great lady luck, I say to myself. Then he opens his caller list of 40 people and runs his finger through looking for anyone with name lukshmi. Then he found client by the name parmeshwara, next comes jai ganesha, venkatesha. In south he has no shortage of names of gods as first name. He then tells me he got appointment to see someone on same day! Wow success! I don’t know what drives him with so much optimism that he will not be thrown out of door or slamed on the phone! Is it praying on his desk? Is he committed to get positive response from somewhere in a day so he does not let down blessings of his mother and wife? Or his style of calling people by the names of god before he calls anybody else. He greets his colleague maria and praises her for keeping bible on her desk… I wonder what would work for me? Faith? Principle? Commitment to family? fasting? rituals? Help me god to choose that works for me!! He managed to reach his target for the month in one weekend, whatever the reason!

No kidding

Best visuals I like on TV are adverts. It is true we are one of the most kids friendly society but in media ‘kids sell’ everything. Starting from tractor, number of insurance companies, ready soup sachets, washing powders, milk flavoring, banks, toothpastes, cars, soaps anything we can think of the storyline is written around kids and most are interesting ones.

Another growing area is cartoon stories from scriptures. Quality of cartoons are very good and stories naturally interesting. By the time they cover stories available from ancient india, there wont be too much of new creative storyline required for at least a decade!! Not just cartoons even serials are dominated by kids oriented stories with baby meera, babay zhansi, baby krsna, balika badhu, babyish bandini, standup comedians … kids are everywhere.

In our block all the kids are out in the evening with their mums and age wise or not they all are playing in various groups, some in strollers and some with their mums and grandmas. Even dance instructor comes and coach bollywood dances in open air sand pit to pre school kids. Koi bole nahi ke ‘pappu cant dance saalaa’. Evenings are full of live human music in common pedestrian zone with random talks and games. Post dusk, they all go inside. And after dinner some are out again with their partners for a walk. Some gujarati neighbours are taking others through steps of garba in preparation for navaratri. In the morning most you see again outside gates awaiting school buses.
Kids rule morning or evening! Considering most have 1 kids each still…

Checkpoint

Let me remember once again opening my front door in Greenlands Close. Coming back from regular shopping to an empty house and no one to open the door while juggling the grocery bags, car keys, car boot and the keys to the door. Nobody around to use their reflexes to attempt at least one for you!!

Getting used to arriving home is slightly different experience here especially if you have vehicles. As you approach at least 2 security guards open the main gates. This is true for most multistory apartment blocks. Everytime coming back to my apartment is like VIP entry to my own society. Talking on the phone to them, they have to end our every sentence with gg. gg. twice g. But thats not all, security guy is one of the most resourceful person around. People in marketing when fail to extract details from secretaries or receptionists, bank on security guy to release mobile phone contacts of everyone from CEO to servants of the company. Sometimes give them even a 100 rps note and they have in entry book all the details. Need electrician, plumber, newspaper delivery guy, milkman, carpenter, dhobi , call security and he will send someone in few minutes. Their presence has some security responsibility too, they check all the servants coming and walking out of premises like airport style security check. Even leftover food given to servant has to tagged with note written to security staff to allow them to take khichadi outside the gate.

So there is no downside? Recently, I made some bhakhree and steamed methi-muthia for a patient and left it in bag to be picked up by Keyur to deliver to concerned party. When we approached to collect the parcel, security guy came up to me and said ‘madam, thoda mistake ho gayaa. Woh guard ko pataa nahi kis ka hai, do roti galati se khaya.’ Actually I saw only 2 pieces rattling at the lower half of the containers. He made such a helpless face I could not say anything other than uttering to myself ‘ taari bhulee thaay’ what else? There goes my half a days work doing all those bhakhree on slow heat excercising my biceps!! I was not sure whether to laugh or cry or get angry. Though I left it without comment I said to myself...

Kya? maaf kiya jaay? chalo thik hai bhuk lagi to khaya but bhakhree ko roti bulaataa hai? aishwarya rai ko rakhi sawant bulaataa hai? khbi maaf nahi kiya?!

By the way, finally got the car today. Did not want to venture out on busy roads without license and last minute how to get reliable driver? Call security and the most decent driver turns up for the job in 15 minutes. What a joy! though felt totally out of place sitting in rear seat. I have to learn to perceive my own self differently all over again. I just realized, It sounds better when I refer to myself as ‘hum’ instead of ‘mein’ from the rear seat.

states of art

I was just wondering, like Americans, if we give pet names to all our states and put it on car plates, how would that be?

I don’t have wide experience in depth of all our states but …

Gujarat can be called a ‘dairy state’ from my little experience. Not only NDDB National Dairy Development Board is pride and joy but I have seen their office ( Gujarat dairy board) in Bangalur prime area. It is not just for namesake as Amul yogurt is equivalent of biopot onken, Amul ghee is nice and crumbly and ofcourse milk. Anyone familiar with Geer forest and their kathiawari ‘dudh-makkhun-malai-chhas’ would not be surprised, to understand this sorathee culture there are plenty folklores, same way south Gujarat’s green belt is rich ‘dairy white’. Although I tried other brands like britania, nilgiris, nestle and they all are good but nothing lubricates my taste buds as Amul.

I have already written so much on Bangalur my adopted homeland that its no news that I would call Karnataka a ‘flower state’. Some of the most exotic flowers you would find here. Flori culture is blooming industry here. Nurseries are everywhere too. Statues of idols are adorned with BigMac size gajras not one but dozen around the statue, most taxi drivers and rickshawala having this sweat and heat smell remover in their vehicles and last but not least so many aam-aurat perfume themselves by fresh flowers everyday. It must be given befitting name to suggest beauty, fragrance and colours of the flowers.

Although Kerala promotes themselves as ’ land of Gods’, I could call it ‘garam masala state’ or ‘spice state’ with land so rich and fertile from where we get cardamom to black pepper. Rajasthan could be called ‘state of riots of color’ or ‘rajvee state’ (already righly called raja’s sthaan) . And what about maha rashtra? I really like mumbaikers patriotism but to call a state ‘great nation’ is over kill isn’t it? Sorry bala sahib, don’t mean to upset you and I have many very dear Marathi friends. And like orange county we could also call our provinces kesar county geernar, hafuz county ratnagiri, sugar county Kolhapur and so on.

I like even native American names with nature names such as turtle creek, and silver mountain and whateva.. but we are very versatile in that respect not just nature we can source names from nakshatra, rashee, rishi, upnishad, scriptures, mythology, animals (land of lion ), spices, festivity (garba county gujarat), languages, we can surpass them in any field.

Now I need sponsors to send me across one by one to each state so I can give pet names to each of our distinct state after travelling!! Talking about states on Talent show on the day of carnival in our apartment 2 tiny kids came to front and one kid mentioned name of the state and other one gave name of the capital. In fact they were so small I could not comprehend their words. Oops!! I did not mean to reveal that I did not know all the capitals!!

What would you call your state?

Lights out & Fans off please

I am sure most of you are still enjoying last few days of holidays. I had my holiday to Ahmedabad, four days stint! I realise it has better roads for a start, rickshawalas are also better than bangalore. Minimum rate is half of bangalore and here rickshawala never returns money back here, in addition to charging 1.5 times the meter.

Coming back from piyar I was given supply of roasted mango gootalis of kesar-keri by my Aai. Isn't it great before cows and goats of Ahmedabad gets taste of it, I nibble it. Isn't it a wonder fruit where nothing goes to waste!? Country where you are greeted on every cross roads by hungry mouths, food waste is considered sin. I am already getting dizzy describing how worn faded cloths and left over food has to be recycled in most appropriate manner. If given to humans you choose from nanny who looks after kids to cleaners whose job is to clean toilets only, and everyone in between, your sense of discretion has to be at sharpest to pass the item to most deserving person for condition of garment or food. when its absolutely not suitable for humans, animals are brought in picture. Other than chhilakas, there is not much for composting i guess. Your own family may not go to garbage bucket to check whats thrown but 'baai' certainly scrutinizes what you throw and rates you whether you are good homemaker or not?!! Even when i throw crust from either side of the loaf and one dry bread I see disgust on face of my helper. She makes it clear time and again that she would be happy to take perishing veggies from fridge or leftovers. I am sure all the 'baai' s when they gather in basement they discuss whose madam allows curd to go green neglecting in the fridge. Timely disposal is very dynamic process. Beauty is that at the end of this visurgen every reciever feels touch better off.

If leftover food has to be treated respectfully considering their after life or second birth whatever you call it, money is real Goddess. For a start I dont find copper pennies on the road but its obvious on the road what value of money drives (or stops) on the road. Come to major traffic junction and there is total silence on otherwise noisy Indian roads where people honk to say 'hi', 'I am coming', 'move out of the way', 'i m stronger', 'i m important' or simply to check their beeps are functioning!! It is at times so quiet that you feel conscious talking on your cellphone because you are heard clearly by not just your fello travellers but other road users too. Almost as if there is government rule they all shut their engines. what a relief from humming sound. People are mindful of consumption of their resources not just purely money aspect. Although I dont think they talk about being aware of environmental issues, its just second nature and no need to drum their ways.

It is visible method to distribute milk in pouches since the dawn of dairy science. But now u get drinking water in pouches and in all the super market they stock hard plasic bottles for oil and ghee but also plastic refill pouches. Smart home makers never buy those hard plastic containers caring for their pockets. Like charity begins at home, respecting your resrouces also begins at home in trurn helping society as by product. Following the principle of liquidity there are no air pockets in boxes carrying this stuff hence more in every sq. ft for transport and less patrol, ok ok let bbc2 come up with exact data from their research on that...

These are just few obvious differences in fast moving consumer goods but if you visit real down town you find shops without any names and hard to figure out what business they do as you see random machineries lying on footpaths and 'kaarigur' sorting the electic cables and wires and dismantling the motors and machineries. Shall we make them aware of their contribution to environment? shall we feel emarrssed about less pretty road side sight seeing or feel happy that they are putting even rusted nails carefully for appropriate afterlife. I am sure its prettier than those landfill sites!!

And what about those pastiwala? Even affluent families are not seen throwing paper int he bin in public places. people haggle to get every last ruppee out of this kabadi guy. For a start there no news agents where every evening plenty of staionary goes back. fraction of paperwaste is also used for food packing for roasted peanuts and fruits and sooti dhagaa that si perfectly biodegradable after use. some school for physically challenged schools make bags for such use with their SEN kids.

Keyur is gradually getting busier by each day. He also has something to say at the end of the day. one little girl insists to be treated by him only. And greets 'doctor uncle, I saw your picture in news paper'. (reminds me of how we as kids used to approach teacher and acknowledge in class ' tecaher I saw you yesterday!! what a delight to see someone you meet everyday but meet once more unexpectedly as bonus'). 'Doctor uncle' ko bhi abhi thoda chuska chadegaa from becoming Mr.Butch to Uncle Doctor. He had one visit to stadium talking to Footballers and 2 talks in IT parks. It was just wonderful to experience the professional approach, tight security of the industry where data protection is paramount, not to mention the wealth of brain power packed in one room to attend the presentation. I wish he writes blog but he is just too busy relishing his new routine. His blackberry is updated real time when patients move from one ward to other or any other updates. No wonder we provide IT to rest of the world. What they call 'Patient choice' in NHS is seen here in ultimate style. Till last minute patients come with quieries and disappear without notice for second opinion or change of heart about treatments . Same way they come to you directly looking for their best buy/ skills available around the town. No need to wait for your GP.

I somehow end up attracting pre-school kids, wonder if it says on my forhead my intellactual age!! We are having ganesh chaturthi and gudipadva celebration/carnival in the apartment block. My first art assignment was to draw 2 giant donkeys for pin the tail game for kids!! We had 3 hours programme to festivity for young and old and couples alike. Took part in 3 legged race, Balloon race for couples and nearly won but not quite!!

Thats all today

Bang on Art

Hi everyone! It has been long since I Walked And talked to myself. Vacation times for us mothers are the busiest and exciting but filled with erratic routine. How are you all? We have not felt being drifted away from everything that was familiar a year ago after reconnecting with some well wisher friends from Manchester. Feels good. There are other good reasons to feel good too. Check out this site below and open 9 aug, timesof india bangalore edition and page 5 from top bar. You may see someone familiar. I know I am a week late in writing this.

http://epaper.timesofindia.com/Daily/skins/TOINEW/navigator.asp?Daily=TOIBG&showST=true&login=default&pub=TOI&AW=1249877871515

What else? Well, pushed by an art_lover friend I stumbled in to an art gallary. Art scene in Bangalore is very active. There are regular exhibitions. And one thing is sure that I cant grab a frame from these galalries as I grab sarees from stores. I am not a big spender on jewellary (so good for Keyur) but even that would look smaller compare to some of the artworks. Let quickly describe 3 different styles we saw… One artist prefers to use torn national geographics and its juxtapositioning to create art from even mythical stories yet most contemporary , at times comic look on canvas. Otherone creates on canvas but with cutout cans, again concept are firmly based on ancient heritage. Some others were based on playing with textures of various kind. There are many such galleries to visit on regular basis but for now first and one visit has put me in a mood to pick up a paint brush again.

Searching for the ‘stuff’, I ended up on PET markets of bangalore. Chickpet, sultanpet, mamalpaet… each with range of products in one category. Most facinating was stationary market and the difference in prices and range of paper products. If I ever thought Chester has unique 2 tier market then this one is multi-tier place. Some garments are hanging from theird floor tatty looking balcony as display to show the stuff available in twist-tiny gullies where looking up towards to overly shining blue sky and croocked steps taking you up there is like an expedition.

Back to art and its performing art. Saw a play called ‘six degrees of seperation’ at local play-house called rangsankara. Talk about the play later… Wow, look at the audience and their style. I would love to identify myself with them most in handloom, khadi, silk variety with modern edge to it. They all appear to be class apart, elit members of society it seemed , the kind you wont find in typical bollywoody entertainment. Play was in English and performed by all Indian stage artists. Back drop was american as it is original american play brought and reproduced by Indian drama company. but roles of black africans and blond europians were played by us without looking like them, powerful script worked. It was satirical in parts and enjoyable. It is bit like ‘catch me if u can’. Most touching reading I found is the lady in central character ends up finding that conman has more in common with her than her own kids!! Now my life in one way entering higher gear by addition of television in the house after arrival of Keyur, need to sort out the vehicle now. On other hand in lower gear as I am busy more around the house.

Independence day and Janmashtmi celebrated back to back.’ Festiviti toh koi humse sikhe!!’ We Indian never tire ourselves from celebration of some kind. Few days back ‘saw’ celebration of var lukshmivratha. Bangalore was covered with flowers and some ladies decorated with flowers worth rps 4000 at home!! In bangalore fruits, flowers ans vegetables are sold side by side in equal proprtion. I was invited by at one place and I too enjoyed the variety they prepare on that day only my host stayed hungry before puja and prasad!! Indepenendce day was wonderful. There is new found patriotism and awareness in youth and society for their Indianness. Malls, restaurants everywhere tricolour or while and bharee sarees we saw.

Rangsankra, wait I am coming back for high end performing art in between let me go to ‘Kaminey’ but full house back to back shows so will have to wait for few days I guess. Next time on frugal India…Wishing you all best for school year ahead.

handsfree on the bus

who thought hands free device was invented for drivers? Who would have imagined the extensive use of hands free device in India? We have changed the meaning of handsfree here. I had pleasure of travelling on a overcrowded jeep from gandhinagar to ahmedabad. As we know they fill this with as many people to make max profit from each trip. The extra confident driver drives the jeep with more efficiency than formula one drivers. Ofcourse his both feet firmly on pedals and one hand on steering wheel and other holding the roof of the car with deadly grip, rest of the body he pushes out of the car to allow one more passenger in front letting his butt hanging in the mid air. ....So back to handfree, generally they are used by non-drivers only. I was lucky to find seat in that next to open exit window/door, lady sitting in front was holding the rod above firmly and handbag with other on edge of the seat and talking away on handsfree. On crowded public travel hands free devices are must where finding and moving your hand on peak hour is a task. Although it appears as if people are falling over each other in buses, amazingly your personal space is never invaded, people know how to hold their luggage and body to themselves on bumpy drive with sudden breaks and changing of lanes. People come aboard and immediately put their heavy laptops on laps of seated passengers. Seated ones with reflexes puts palms to secure the stranger’s laptop. I wonder if they know each other already! But no. There is no ‘r u sure you don’t mind’, ‘u r so kind’ ‘so thought full of you’ no such exchanges. Indians act and move on from each situation without fuss. I was offered once to hold my 3 tiny booklets to seated passenger in case my hand was getting stiff trying not to fall! People are less paranoid about rights and personal space in general, intellectual property rights and many more including more importantly teenager’s rights!

Still from the bus...I enjoy hop, skip and jump on buses. That allows me to see so many sites I would otherwise ignore/miss. I was looking out and saw shop called yellamma devi’s shop. There where photos of cow and other deities and garlands. There were couple of ladies looking ever so pretty with big bindi, saree and double gajra in hair and doing some work. As I followed their hand movement I saw it was meat shop and they were chopping away. ‘devi maa, itnaa bhi sumhaar mut karo!’ I have also seen other unsuitable names such as supriya pig shop. Oh no how can a pig be su-priy?! If it is priy then why priy pig would have such fate?!! Essentially a Butcher sounds so poetic and graceful with that gajra!

addressing

Move over, Carla Bruni! We are the new pair of Mademoiselles! Ever since we arrived here I am trying to look sideways, behind to double check if they are addressing me only everytime they address madam! Gate keepers, servants, helpers, milkman, newspaper man, dhobi they all don’t start or end without madam and sir. Infact they stand in so polite posture and humbleness in the eyes that I get scared if I lift my eyelid bit bigger they will fall. As they say it mudum for everything, sometimes yes, no, here you go, please, sorry everything is replaced with mudum, mudum and mudum.

I don’t deny that I have not heard people addressing others as saheb in Ahmedabad but mostly it would be sarcastic friendly joke to known friend!! Whats more if they really like you they will treat you like unruly child with expressions like ‘ey chul be’, ‘topi aagho rhe’, ‘samajya havey bes bes’. And if you are talking to someone really successful and affluent you can always address as ‘Maheshiyaaa, vikramiyaaa, Akki, Aski, bharattaaa...not only there is no sir but we distort their names truncked if big, and, extened it if small, in no particular order as a reward for their success. And it still sound melodius is an art! Bindhasst Gujaratis!!
Sweetest is Kamya’s friends talk to me and address with name followed by auntie and to my immense joy invites me home for joint mother-daughters gatherings (i have yet to attend). My ears are not yet fully tuned for that though. I remember school friends there would just call and say ‘is kamya THUR?’ and if lucky add prickly ‘please’ at the end. I was no name attendant. If you think of it now in this mobile phone age some mothers wont have even that previledge of answering landline calls for permission.

whiplash injury

Talking about health and safety... we take it in our stride. My classmate entered class sweating like hell and panting and limping to the chair. His foot was run over by a wheel of passing car. Teacher seriously heard but continued lecture. After convenient break he asked to be excused early due to pain. Teacher caringly refused said very important information to be delivered just hang in there as there was no swelling only pain otherwise you will miss out on it. At the end he discussed about roadside accidents from pedestrian point of view and how to withstand being run over on the roads, how different makes of cars and tyres would hurt in which way. He also very confidently said you will not get fracture if you stupidly don’t wriggle your toes after accident. Just move on to your business as if nothing happened!! Yes, everyone bumps into everyone on the road, there is almost no road rage and certainly no whiplash injury compensations. Poor unborn breed of injury lawyers and ofcouse doctors!!!

Use or not to use

If I say ‘yellow construction hat’, what would you associate with?! A hunky builder? Or some boringly unimaginative people may think of health and safety?!! I saw it in completle contrast! It was worn by the dainty construction worker lady and worn upside down. She found it more useful to carry it like clay pot with water only she put some brocken tiles, any objections with that? See, gadget is something that comes handy, now if required this can very well be used to serve sambhaar or tadka daal after a good rinse in lunch hour. And 'Improvization' bhi koi chiz hoti hai.

By the same token you can ignore usefulness of a gadget if it hinders your work. Living in Diary and time obsessed Britain, first gadget that we all must adhere to is clock, isn’t it?! Not in India. I have started a course ( i will write about it later ) and first thing my coach loud and clear said that wrist watch is the worst thing to have it on you when you are in work mode. Never look at time when you have goal in front of you. For example, if you have to capture market in young people working in call centres than don’t expect to get any response from them during the day when they are sleeping, instead put up stall when they have lunch time break by American time in middle of the night. They will happily come and spend few minutes looking at your products. Not wearing watch does not mean you reach late in morning either, anyone reaching late has to be punished in sweet way. 10 minutes and you bring chocolate, 20 minutes and you bring proper mithaai and so even sponsor lunch for entire class. It pinches when in middle of the class your teacher sends you out to get some food but then it is compensated by gratitude and wah – wah done by rest of peers. As soon as one has to shade some rupees they are careful next time!

Am I qualified to say about work culture?

Every time I called helpline services in UK, I spoke to Indian sitting in one of the call centres here. I found their diction clear, voice crisp, very polite, patient and above all endlessly helpful. Made me feel very proud. Thats end of all the praises. Listen to public opinion here, I just did training to be financial advisor for a company. First thing they highlight in how many ways work I would do as pestering insurance agent is so dignified as compare to call centre staff. Most centres are in south and newspapers clearly says ‘bride wanted, but call centre girls need not apply’. Lot of evidence to suggest socially unapproved activities in centres and locals blame call centres for spoiling social fabric.

Do I feel reassuringly happy about being agent/advisor, then? Wait till you hear this. My classmate a bihari girl Engineer and fresh MBA. To be able to appear for MBA final exam took five days leave and in this economic slowdown, job she was doing in software firm in marketing with good incentive shook hands for last time. Disappointed girl joined the training I was doing and was so embarrassed to inform father that she is trying to be agent/advisor. Father would be disgusted’ ‘all these education I gave you to do this type of sales job.’ The girl, cant be honest and inform father to avoid hurting him, cant say she lost job for exams, cant say she is already working on other honourable work as he would not like that either. Father wants nothing less than ‘proper dream job’. She has interview to suit her MBA in one of the hospital, good luck lukshmi, Hats off to you for being so sensitive to your fathers dreams for you!! And you have not done anything to feel bad about! You will find job sooner or later in the meantime be as loving as thoughtful to your father!’ There is no job more enriching than that feeling of...

We are not politically correct here. Equal opportunity? Whats that? Life is race, no body waits to prove anything on paper. I went to a technical job opportunity and I was told sorry mudum, we don’t need women. (all for good intention, he did not want me to get tanned doing field work on hot sunny day, not suitable for ladies).

I called call centres, and they point blank asked

‘how old, mudum?’

‘umm oh i think 40 something’

‘sorry, mudum nobody over 25 we are interested in.’
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Food Talk? Here we get the best Italian Gelatos including indian Alphonso Gelato, watermelon gelato. Fruit basket has no fruits other than saffron succulant Mangos.


It rains now here. Rain in Banglur is very pleasant. That pre rain sweet smell of soil!

Class Act

Pyara Sakhi- vrund,

Remember, attending those parents evening? You sit in front of teacher while she spreads A4 record book and cleverly conceals everything below the name of your child and show record of your childs performance? She tells your child has scored (say) 93 marks. Being typical Indian helicopter parent with your hungry eyes try to peek on the records to make sure no higher number shows in front of any other name! That remained my regret that inspite of plenty of opportunity to receive roaring round of applauds for her performance she never came home chuffing for getting highest marks. It is socially incorrect to announce marks as it is damaging to self esteem of under achievers. So give them sanctuary to remain under cover.

To give me cringe, I had to live through quite opposite! In my course they did objective tests for practice. After the test teachers collects papers and distributes to other students randomly in a way you don’t get your own paper to correct. OMG! Disaster! My paper was given to 20 year old girl with un inhibited voice that springs out like a dancing fountain. My every incorrect answer she loudly announced, ‘sir, she has put ? instead of tick mark, sir’ (shhhhh means she is confused and has no clue what to tick, will u shut up?!). How many got questions 5 wrong? and everyone holding wrong answer proudly raises hand (meri ijjat thodi na jayegi?!). Sir gets the name of the default student and best part, clears the concept in front of 35 students, would you ever forget and make same mistake twice in real exam? Just for the record I did this Exam by IRDA board and passed with distinction.

Maid-hum

Have I said anything about our home helper? Everyone complains about her sloppy work and look down on her social problems but I see more...

She calls me maidum, sounds like she is aware I am recent transformation from maid to maidum!

She comes between 6 and 7 in the morning and comes with a big smile and fragrance of jasmine. Sometimes she brings me bunch of Jasud and mogra garland for ceramic pot for the lounge. And takes it upon herself to refine the position of flowers in the water by fingering gentle adjustments . I find her smile alone worth lot more than her salary but it is not just smile I take in. I make extra cuppa T for her every morning and feel great for myself but wait till I find what others can do.

Savitri as I call her is no more than skin and bones but overflowing with grace and feminity. She has got figure that size 0 enthusiast try hard to achieve (what a misery) while depriving themselves of food and depriving loved ones who cook for them of having any reward for serving them food sprinked with love/care. She has high school going kids. And a husband who drinks a lot and beats her. One day she was bruised and said she has summon her mother-in-law and asked her to take her son away to their village as she cant put up with this drinking and beating anymore. wow what a spirit! doing household work but has confidence (unlike me) to manage in costly city like Bangalore to raise 2 kids and aspire to give them best future (just like me). She has joyous excitement and anticipation on day of results of her kids. While I was away packing remnants of my sansaar in UK, she was also busy shifting as lot happened in her life. She came with bruises on neck and could not speak. My young neighbour lady could not tolerate this and she and her husband held savitri’s hand and put her in car mentioning about hospital treatment but went straight to her home. ‘Gentle’man neighbour beat her husband to heart’s content and they said it is actually savitri who should be doing rounds of beating him rather otherway round due to his irresponsible behaviour. What also came to light is that the lady she brought to us introduing as her sister was actually second wife of her husband. So my neighbour rented another affordable house near our area and shifted her with kids with everything including kitchen sink. (did I hear anyone say ‘social security’? Security is in having awake and involved society around, isn't it?) She appears in control, wakes up at 5 prepares tiffin for kids as outside meals are not good for their health. (kunjal, something to learn, what are you doing devouring those chaats from laariwala all the time?)

Whats missing since her relocation is her jasmin gajra from her tidyly comed hair! (guess why?)

Whats still there is genuine care for others. As I try to land a hand to squeeze water out of bedsheets, she vehmently throws me out of bathroom, its her job and she wont let me do any labour. Little on resources in kitchen when she is late I often have to clean some pots and pans for morning breakfast and servant lady on 7th floor talks to savitri working in my gallary ‘your maidum did all the burtans’!! And having growing kishori at home she has found another old rickshawalla who provides chartered services to drop and pick up her pride and joy, Daughter. No bheed-bhaad of buses or anyone brushing past her princess!!


How many of us ladies or mothers hear from our loved ones, kids and husbands included something similar to ‘urey, yeh tune kar liya? Kyoun? Merey liye intzaar ker leti’ (regretting when you are not fast enough to sort something before your loved one puts their efforts in doing same).

What I see is her BIG heart hiding between those skin and bones.

She is very happy to have doctor Keyur around complains often about headache to get feelgood of recieving those 'imported' medicine. (Now I am not taking trouble of explainging to her that those 'imported' places actually import generic medicine from her neighbourhood only).

I have admired my neighbour openly for her initiative to wake up her human soul to try and break life of anxiety, disgrace and money down the drain to satisfy her husband's liquor needs. And I said that may be we should start the NGO together and when in need her husband can do some pitaai and my husband can do some davaai for our clients!!

Oodles of joy from Ooty

Constellation of friends,

I am sorry for the mix up of mail. Virus has been doing rounds these days!! But I guess you did not have permanent loss of data and are still talking to me!!??

I ve been to UK an back. I apologize for not getting in touch while there, it was impossible to do anything else other than pack up. Since our separation (keyur & me), Keyur has vowed to do everything ‘together’ only and kept even copies of every newspaper from my last visit by bedside for ‘us’ to pick up ‘together’!! !

I am sure most of you are having vacation fun at home and abroad. Meanwhile we had short break to Ooty and what an aromatic break it was!! Ooty, short form of Udgam madalam meaning queen of hills. First time since my arrival words fail to come. I have not seen such fertile soil anywhere else in the world. Greenery and scenery, yes we find everywhere but not this kind. Every particle of soil is capable of bearing fruit. Neel Giri (blue mountain) is coverted with flora and fauna that can be consumed one way or the other. You can sip eucalyptus with every breath in. No wonder it used to have sanatorium in those days. There are other spices such as clove, javintri etc etc. I would not recognize these spices by their colours! Such deep and fresh and moist they were. If we try to put scissors to clove it oozes oil and the stem will not break as opposed to overly dried and already extracted cloves we get in supermarkets. Javantri looked like rose petals. Some other spices used for birayani etc. Lot of these spice plants were replaced with tea plantation to satisfy foreign thirst are still thriving. Visited tea factory and packed some. Also collected five variety of essential oils. Best part was journey through nature reserve of bandipur and muddumalai. Dense bamboo woods and calm yet alive forest with wildlife in its natural habitat. On way back stopped over at water fall, its was more like small to large pebble field with water playfully flowing down. One can jump over those rocks at various points. Very accessible and inviting rather than intimidating like niagra.

Ok, welcome back home and from serene sound of nature to thumping music of catwalk for the launch of a scandinavian label called ‘jack and jones and only’. Took some picture with Neil Nitin mukesh and Anushka sharma. He is very cultured and she is very fragile and exquisite. I wonder in amazement looking at these beautiful species that look like humans but lot different than me!

Yes, you guessed it Keyur gave them bhavan website and promised they would be looked after if they visit manchester-bhavan.

With flavourful and spiced up goodwill for you all